I think I came on my cycle, I know it's something I should be used to by now but I didn't want my period to come. I took 4 home pregnancy tests and 2 out of 4 came back positive 1 was in valid and the other said negative. I was so excited and eager to be pregnant. I just knew my husband and I would spread the news January 19th after the official Doctor's visit. But now I'm scared there won't be any news to spread.
I have to put my HUMANLY feelings aside and continue to trust in God. I know he makes no mistakes but Shooot I thought I was pregnant. My husband is just so monotone I'm not really sure if he was truly Happy when I showed him the positive tests or if he was just saying it because it was the right thing to say! But whatever the case maybe I know he loves me and just wants me to be happy. At this moment I just want to be held and told it's Okay. I had a baby name picked out if it were a girl and he had the name if it was a boy. I started the prenatal vitamin and all but now I'm on my cycle and frustrated.
Now WHAT????? If I'm not pregnant do we keep trying even though I'm not working and just hope it happens within this week? Or do we get on Birth Control and I look for a job and then plan for the baby? Planning for a baby seems weird like your a mad scientist and your trying to do God's work. So many thoughts and so many emotions.
What really sucks is I have menstrual cramps and I usually never have any cramps when I'm on my cycle. This really SUCKS:( And I canceled our trip to Sandals due to expecting a baby in September.
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